Monday, 17 July 2017

Branding Is Not A Design - It is Your Value Proposition


Have you ever heard someone say? "Geez, I don't think I can do that because I don't want IT to interfere with my brand...." And then, you wonder...What the heck is this person's brand about anyway?...He he he.

I know we live in a fickle society where many have to FAKE IT - JUST TO MAKE IT. Where we have to show off, just to prove that we too have got it. It is so much easier to FIT IN & join the crowd. Do what everyone else is doing.


But it is also your responsibility to stand in your UNIQUENESS and challenge the myths of social tradition or ruffle the status quo.

Hence my New Signature Class - The (B)(R)(A)(G) VIP Masterclass (available for only 5 VIP's weekly)

In this media master class, I highlight the four major principles of the BRAG Factor™ for reaching your success goals.

So let's talk about the first one - B is for BRANDING. Yes branding is the ways you establish an image of who you are, or what your company is or product does. But it is also the way you communicate what you actually stand for and what differentiates you from others - both in a visual, practical and emotional way.

It is how you distinctively shape people’s perception of who you are and what your deal is.

The weird part of it all is that - With branding, what your tribe, customers, clients, followers, community or fans say about your brand is your market reality (not what you’d like them to think). Mostly because their thoughts about YOU is either based on an emotional feeling that you evoke in them or based on practical experiences they’ve had - coming in contact with you, your work or your product, good or bad.


So what impression pops into people's minds when they hear about you, your work or your business? Do you show up 100% Authentic - the real deal, or do you come off as a fraudster, a groupie or just another impostor trying to hustle them off their hard earned money?

Well...One of the toughest lines to walk - Is the wobbly line where the Brand is also the Individual.

In my own case - Alex Okoroji is a Person, But Alex Okoroji is also the Brand.

In other words, I am not an inanimate product, I am a real human being and in many cases, flawed with some imperfections.

How-ever way - I need to project an image of myself, I must remember to include my flaws in the equation. I am learning that I must create the kind of communication, that gives me the room to still make mistakes that are permissible. For anything that projects me as perfect will in the long run, do me more harm - than good, because I know that I'm not perfect, and I don't try to be.

Sure - I too know how to SLAY... I too have a glam team. I can choose to drive my Range Rover if I want, can create my own instagram picmix from the red carpet and I too can rock borrowed clothes from fashion designers and tag them on social media...

Wait - I too can own a website for every single day...Start a podcast for every topic- In fact host five of them, If I want... I can pretend to be a bestselling author, start my own blog because everyone else has one and produce my own blockbuster films, because I know a few money bags too and I can hang out with the cool kids with deep pockets, in Banana Island - and then chill with my celebrity lover on an Island - sipping "monkey business" in Seychelles and making front page news.

But that's not what real branding is about?

We are made to believe that branding is about the wrappings, the glamorous package. That it is solely about the luxurious PRESENTATION...the external design, the ribbons, the frills, the decoration, the colors, logos and the name tags - so much so, that many people focus all of their energy & resources on that and then forget to do the internal underground work of actually building themselves or scaling their products or service.


People sell that 'marketing' fallacy... And almost anyone seeking success falls for it - That's where I roll on the floor laughing.

Surely if you wrap up a sanitary towel like you will, a freshly baked bread - Yasss...the first set of people will buy it, but will they eat it and convince the rest of the world that your sanitary towel is now delicious wheat bread? C'mon na...Think again!

Do you think Coca-cola became FAMOUS simply because of its logo, colour, bottle, packaging or the advertising dollar?

Yes, Advertising works well, but the success of advertising depends on the message you are trying to send. In fact what advertising does - is try to effectively communicate your VALUE PROPOSITION, that is - if you have one.

Over the weekend, I committed a fashion crime. I re-rocked an outfit that I wore only two weeks ago to receive my Goodwill Award in Abuja - and then wore the same outfit to the African Movie Academy Awards 2017 few days later.

When I initially told my business manager, Victoria what I was going to do - She didn't seem too ecstatic about my decision - she reminded me of how I'm supposed to be one of the most influential women in the world...And how I needed to live up to that tag and the fame. Ha ha ha.

As the natural rebel that I am, I argued and mentioned how my fellow Influential Woman, Hillary Clinton would most probably wear her famous pant suits, I'd imagine that she doesn't have sleepless nights worrying about what new fancy sequined dinner gown, she will wear to an event. That being said, I understand Ms Victoria's intentions - after all, its her job to make sure I put my best foot forward in public, but it is also my responsibility to remember the core element that differentiates my own personal brand - believe me, when I say - It is not what I wear.

I'm not saying, we shouldn't care about how we look, Geez - I'm still a sexy woman who cares about her appearance...I'm just saying that if the investment we make is simply to influence other people's opinions of what we supposedly represent - then it is pointless.


I mean - You could dress to kill and people will still think you are a pretty airhead. Yikes!

And I refuse to be the kind of brand who fusses about such mundane things...(Ha ha ha...You can say I got away because it was a different crowd, or because I got to the event rather late....didn't even take red carpet photos...So some people might miss it. But I'm not ashamed to nail myself to the fashion cross).

In the entertainment industry - What I did is a sin, a crime... But who made it so?

Why should it be a crime for my brand to wear an outfit that I bought with my own hard earned money, more than once? After all, I wear the clothes, the clothes doesn't wear me. And what my brand represents, is certainly deeper than what I wear or do not wear.

Why should it even be a crime if facebook founder, Mark Zuckerberg wears the same grey shirt or has 200 pieces of the same shirt? Why should it even matter if a celebrity always wears the same hairstyle or re-rocks their own clothes?

Surely, the average young celebrity or millennial woman would love to attract the "Perceived Lifestyle" of a Beyonce or a Kim Kadarshian... In their minds, looking seemingly successful is what branding is about. But I can bet my left breast, that in the confines of their designer walk-in closets - both "Slay Queens" - Beyonce & Kim deeply respect, admire and innately wish to have the statue and brand longevity of a "Hillary Clinton" or an "Oprah Winfrey" and it has nothing to do with how they look.

Think about this ....Would it matter if Hillary or Oprah put on weight, didn't wear expensive fancy shoes for a week, had a messy hair day doing social work in Uganda or forgot their fake eyelashes, their body shapers or make up contour?


Would they be less of a powerhouse brand?

Err...I doubt it - because what they stand for, represent or try to communicate about their brand value, is certainly not skin deep, surface based or tied to their physical assets, but the impact of the value, they bring to their community and the world at large.

It has me thinking of a woman, I have secretly come to admire - FELICE COHEN & one of my co-authors in the global anthology - I BARED MY CHEST who's famous video has over 17 Million views and hundreds of media interviews & publications about her 90 Square Feet Apartment in New York. To me she is the minimalist queen - The Brand Face for "Tiny House" or Tiny Living... Actually she promotes living LARGE but with little. Of course, she has moved up and bought her own home & doesn't live in that tiny apartment anymore - but her views & lifestyle carries on. And even though I am by no standard, a minimalist...I am learning everyday to merge the minimalist values from her award winning book "90 Lessons" with my bodacious personality.

Let me bring it home a bit and use one of Nigeria's Iconic Actor - RICHARD MOFE DAMIJO (RMD). It is so easy for the modern day actor in Africa or even aspiring artistes to think that RMD's Brand is a combination of how he looks or what he wears, instead of the decades of hard work and discipline he has put in to his craft. Unfortunately the media perpetuates that belief, when they promote more of his looks and fashion attires, instead of all the amazing mentoring he gives young people & peers on a daily basis - or his recent amazing performances in blockbuster films.

But - I honestly think it won't matter if RMD was an Actor, or became a Politician, it won't matter if he was a Lawyer, Writer, a Speaker, Coach, Pastor or just an Entrepreneur. It won't matter if he was wearing an Agbada, a ripped pair of jeans, a designer Tuxedo, Bathroom Slippers or a Pyjamas...Some people will make it look like it matters though - Of course, it is their job to feed off the grave insecurity of others and make money from it.

But in truth, it won't matter. It really won't matter if RMD spoke Queens English or Waffi Pidgin... Or if he was completely NAKED with a toned butt, washboard abs, a six pack or a one pack filled with a sac of potatoes in his mid-section. He he he.

He still will be serving us the RMD effect without even trying - because his brand is so much deeper than what is revealed on the outside. And that's why he remains relevant despite his career transitions.

Want to build your brand?...Don't build a brand on false extensions.


I see too many FAKE BRANDS. Yes. fake people calling themselves "brands" and I chuckle. Strip them NAKED - off all the fancy coverings & layerings, and watch them have nothing and BE absolutely nothing. The worst part is that in their brand elements - you can't even differentiate them from another. They seem to be a copy cat extension of someone else.

The smart people who create BRANDS know that creating differentiation is not about a logo, a website or social media pages. They understand that it is about creating an individual personality, an authentic background story, an effective message, and the right communication strategy or channels to elevate one's value proposition, not just the packaging.... The design is necessary - but it should only enhance the value you have to offer.


So when corporate brands seek ambassadors or celebrities for endorsements, we know its not about the individual but the perceived value they think the individual represents or will bring.

The question - I don't think they remember to ask themselves though, is - What exactly is "this value" this person will bring? How can we identify what they truly stand for, represent and measure the impact of their value, beyond the noise they make? Aha!

So when people ask me - Wow... Alex, how do you strengthen your brand?


I say determine what your brand represents and strive for more - More Impact, More Meaning.

Check what YOU stand for and make sure it resonates deeply and it stays consistent.

Make your brand deeper - than your physical assets...Make it deeper than your looks... Make it deeper than the products, goods or service you provide. Let your brand equate - not the product, but THE VALUE of the product.

Tie your brand to a real vision... To a universal goal, to a PURPOSE bigger than yourself... Tie it to a deeper universal message or to others creating meaning - because "Depth creates meaning". Meaning adds VALUE. And sustainable branding is really about VALUE.


Here's My Question for you -

1) How is your brand creating impact or adding value to the world today? 

2) How well do you communicate what YOU stand for??


LETS TALK: What do You THINK, Truth-Seekers? Feel free to EXPRESS your thoughts in the comment section. Better still, send me a FREE Voice Message and I'll respond.




To Your Success,
Stay Authentic & Keep Winning!

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Want To Make SUCCESS Moves? - HERE'S YOUR CALL TO ACTION - Take YOUR Pick!

 


#1) Grab the 9 Success Principles  I use to earn my BRAGGING Rights? Get your copy of my Digital Bundle - STRIPPED DOWN SUCCESS For Creatives. (This bundle contains an eBook, Work-Book and Bonus Audio) with practical and actionable strategies you can immediately use collectively to achieve more success, no matter where you are on the success ladder. CLICK HERE For Bundle.

#2) You can join My LIVE 1-1 TRAINING CLASS from anywhere you are in the world on ZEQR - For one hour, I'll teach you the 9 Principles for Success...and hold your hands as you make big moves. Only 8 seats available per class.

How To Become A Successful Creative In Just 9 Weeks...


#3) Feel FREE to jump in and Join ME inside my Inner Circle and CONNECT with other VIP's in - The BRAG Club (For Influencers). Invite your fellow influencers too - It's FREE. Success rubs off nicely. Remember you are a product of the people you surround yourself with. Go to www.TheBragClub.com. There's a welcome GIFT waiting for you on the Inside.


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I'll love to HEAR from you. And don't forget to watch the replay or GRAB your pass to get the downloadable recording of the just concluded live virtual summit with ME and 25 Amazing Speakers from around the world at THE NAKED CHALLENGE: Creative Mastery Global Summit 2016 that streamed LIVE from Monday July 4 - Saturday July 9, 2016.

Click HERE to Join Waiting List & Be among first 100 Creatives to Get 50% Discount on  Summit Bundles.

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I look forward to hanging out with All VIP Influencers in the Prestigious 'THE BRAG CLUB. Want to Reach More Goals, Create More Impact and Earn Your Bragging Rights? Click GO NOW

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It is a Witty Intimate & Relatable guide to the crazy TRUTH about Love, Life, Relationship, Sex, Reality & Re-invention of self. It offers WISDOM to those who are struggling to accept the truth about who they really are and what they truly want out of life.  Get your copy NOW!

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Join my signature VIP Coaching for Influencers - REIVENTION 1-on-1 I'm very excited to show you step by step, in just 30 days, how I have re- built my brand from stagnancy back to relevance. Go EARLY NOW and Register HERE for your 25% discount.


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Get ready for a BRAND NEW SEASON  starting in August 2017. Don't forget to call in to my globally syndicated show via +1-(215)-383-3766 and catch me on Talk Wednesday and Friday Radio SpecialLIVE @ 9pm (GMT) on THE NAKED TALK Radio Show. Its always a stimulating conversation with my guests. 



NOTE : Join Me In My Effort To Change The World With My Empowering Thoughts. If You Like Today's 'Boost....Then Don't Forget To Comment and Share It With Those You Love (Or Even Like A Lot).

Got A Question? Feel Free To #AskAlexHere. If You Want Some Talk Therapy Instead, Then Take Advantage of my Private One-on-One and Book an appointment with #AskAlex using SetMore NOW!!!

Have A Magnificent Monday Lovelies. Kisses!!!





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Wednesday, 7 June 2017

5 Ways To Literally Attract The Success You Desire


Even though, I’ve been in the entertainment business for almost 12 years - working in almost every aspect of the creative industry (sometimes rather silently), other times being in the news and more often having my boring private life under public scrutiny. I’ve always aspired to reach and grow beyond the SCREEN and stage. Grow to a place where I can reach out to empower, TRANSFORM, and serve others to succeed at being their authentic best.

You see, I’ll be completely transparent with you. I’ve been on a long personal journey to find my PATHPURPOSE and PASSION. And I did.

You know how you get that feeling that there may be MORE deep down “INSIDE” of you? You know that feeling - when you wonder, if you are living up to your fullest potential?

That feeling you get, when you know there's so much more you can GIVE beyond the fame and fortune. That yearning to stop compartmentalizing your many talents and step out as the full-on expressionist that I knew I was - I remember explaining it on air to Chiamaka Chuke Okafor host of the IAmAfripreneur Business Podcast on her amazing show HERE.

In my personal quest discovering The NAKED Philosophy™, I found that there indeed was more inside that I wanted to reveal, GIVE and succeed at achieving...and as the honor and accolades come. I realise everyday, how good I have become at impacting the world.

Dang! I am not as rich as "Bill Gate" or "Mark Zuckerberg". Shucks, I am NOT donating millions of dollars, POUNDS or Naira - or flooding my instagram timeline with gucci, prada or the phony lifestyle of the rich and famous - but - I still give what I have...I am super generous with my talent, knowledge, expertise, experience and time. And that is just as incredibly powerful.

They say "No person was ever honored for what they received. HONOR is the reward you attract for what you GIVE."

So TRUTH-Seeker, what are YOU really giving of yourself today???

Many people crave SUCCESS daily -Success for some people, might be experiencing financial independence or freedom, to some it might be achieving fame, actualising a goal, and to others, it might be living in awareness of their purpose or creating IMPACT.

Whichever way you choose to define your own success, there are actionable ways to ATTRACT real success into your life and I want to share 5 of them with you in this article - All of which I apply. But... first, let me celebrate a few of my recent success..


Yesterday, I received a phone call from an entertainment journalist who wanted my response, to the messages flying around social media, in which my father - Tony Okoroji congratulated me, on my accomplishments. For me, doing the interview last night was a privilege, despite the fact that I have been featured in this same magazine, several times - Not to mention the myriads of instant messages from exes, collaborators and friends, that have me feeling gleeful. I swear "Congratulations Alex, I am proud of you" is a major confidence booster... Yup! even for me - Not, that I have ever - been in short supply of confidence. I even spoke with my uncle who is absolutely blown away, thanks to my dad spreading the good news.

All of a sudden, my absence from red carpet events and public functions was starting to make sense. Alex Okoroji didn't just disappear from planet earth into obscurity...I simply withdrew my efforts from things that weren't serving me or giving me fulfillment... and invested my time into creating genuine impact, the kind of impact that attracts bigger success.

I will not trivialize my many accomplishments as some others would - pretentiously... I am looking forward to being honored in July with my "Nigeria Goodwill Ambassador Award" Yasss! it is a big deal for me. I also consider it big a deal, to be listed in Charles O'Tudor's 35 Personal Brands-To-Watch 2017 - The Global List. I still wonder if the brand guru saw my future. Ha ha ha.



Whoosh!...I am still freaking PUMPED that this is my 8th week ranking on Richtopia's - 'TOP 250 Most Influential Women Leaders' in the World. I haven't been kicked out yet...Yay!

And I feel so incredibly honored to still be ranked on this global list, with some of the world's most powerful female prime ministers, media icons, philanthropists, thought leaders, celebrities and powerhouse women like Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Yoko OnoHelen Clark, JK Rowlings, Ellen Degeneres, Emma Watson, Shonda Rhimes, Melinda Gates, Theresa May, Katie Couric, Christiane Amanpour and many more girl power...Yup! I'm the fourth Nigerian Woman on the list with the amazing Abike Dabiri Erewa, Oby Ezekwesili and Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala.

Alex Okoroji - One of Richtopia's Top 250 Most Powerful Women Badge

Added to the above, is my recent international honor receiving the WEF ICONIC WOMAN AWARD for "Iconic Women Creating A Better World For All" at the 2017 Annual Global Women Economic Forum in New Delhi, India for my contributions as an agent of global change.

Dr Harbeen Arora, Global Chairperson of All Ladies League presenting 'WEF Iconic Woman Award' to Alex Okoroji on the 10th of  May at The 2017 Annual Global Women Economic Forum in New  Delhi, India

Yes, this little rogue woman from Nigeria sure did it. Mama...Yasss...I did it! I'm creating impact...Global Impact...Whoop! Ha ha ha.

Okay -Those who follow me on social media are probably CRINGING right now from reading... Yikes!....yada yada yada...Gosh! Alex...This AGAIN! We've heard it before. Ha! This is stale news - Tell us something new. Kwa kwa kwa...

You probably don't know that 2017  hasn't always been a smooth sail.

My year did NOT start out beautifully at first.

I was almost sure I was going to have a very shitty year.

First, I got robbed on a movie set while filming a TV series, my phones stolen, my websites got hacked and was wiped out entirely, I lost 3 years of amazing content, emails and a dear person too.

I even lost my energy and motivation to work or finish up pending projects. And yes, I still had to raise my son all by myself in the middle of all the fucking chaos.

Soon after, I realized that I couldn't let bad circumstances STEAL my Joy or dictate my destiny. I stopped mourning my loss... And decided to rebuild.

I decided to REINVENT once again. I spent 49 hours awake (no shut eye) and re-designed a brand new website for myself, wrote a few emails, got on a few radio shows and went back to work.

I had re-discovered my Mojo. But I somehow knew that I First had to BREAK down to BREAKTHROUGH.

Now I'm celebrating my breakthroughs and Counting my blessings.                                                                                                                                                                                   Some people will say..."Here we go - She's bragging again".  But you know what...There is a wise quote that says "its not bragging if you can back it up". And I sure as hell - back up all my claims.

I stopped apologizing for celebrating my accomplishments. Why should I? When I have learned that "celebration" honors the hardwork, progress and commitment we put into the work we do, despite the challenges we face on our journey to success.

For me, these achievements are REMINDERS that - It doesn't matter where in the world you live or come from, or what challenges you have, how shallow or deep your pocket is or how much society continues to restrict you with their limiting beliefs.

What truly matters - is that YOU choose not to limit yourself. That you are ready to birth your VISION and travel as far as you can - to complete your MISSION... And make sure that the vision you create - provides SOLUTION to a problem that impacts another person positively.

So, maybe you are exhausted about the success that seems so elusive. Maybe you want to throw in the towel and just give up. No, don't do it...Not yet!

Here are 5 Strategies I Use to Attract SUCCESS - Apply Them and Be Sure That Your Reward and Honor will be well on its Way.                                                                                                                                                                          

#1) Express It - My FIRST strategy for reaching success in any goal - is to put the plan out there in the universe, so I can become accountable. It is the first step process of The NAKED Philosophy™ - EXPRESSION (could either be an articulation of a challenge or a declaration of desire). So ...Yeah...Yeah! Get up - and get ready to declare your intention.

See - I believe in affirmation. I believe in the power of expression. I believe I can tell the universe how I feel or what I want... And the universe listens to me and then aligns itself for my greatness.

This is for real. It always works for me, because I'm forced to deliver when I tell the world what I intend to achieve.

Imagine being a public FAILURE - setting myself up...falling down on my big round ass, so people can laugh at my foolishness and say "Yeah, that's right... Alex the big fat dreamer" - No way, I have no choice but to slay and WIN. And you too should try it.

Set a goal... Set a date and Announce to the world your next big project. Tell your friends, family, colleagues or followers on social media that "big idea" that has you tossing and turning in bed - then get ready to make it happen.

2) Collaborate With Others - Once you have identified what you want to achieve, now it is time to find the people, brands and resources that can help you make that VISION come true.

Be relentless about it. Dig for winners. Find people who make you elevate your standards and reach out to them... Extend something valuable too. Don't just be a taker - come with something AMAZING too. Bring something incredible to the table, that they might find worthy. Be it an idea, creativity, contacts, resources or just provide solution to their problems or hand them an offer they too can not resist. Winners are GIVERS...Winners don't compete, they collaborate.

When you open your heart, expand your MIND and operate from a place of ABUNDANCE and not Scarcity. Partners become resources. Resources become Endless... And YOU my dear, become UNLIMITABLE because you are able to spot opportunity even in the least obvious circumstances, and see the vision, beyond its physical boundaries. You learn what real winning feels like, surrounded by real players.

Don't worry about being out-shined, upstaged or faffing around in the background, while someone else takes your glory - That fear stems from scarcity mentality - The thought that "success" is so hard to come by, so limited, that it will not be enough to go round , so only you have to go the journey alone, just so you don't have to share the spotlight with someone else - WRONG MOVE!!

Don't be ashamed or afraid to join forces with other people who are travelling towards the same direction or along the same path with you, and are ready to win too - Even if you are an expert too. Coaches also have their mentors.

Travelling by yourself, can be a lonely, long and tiring experience. Having people to share the challenges and the burden makes it easier. Remember if your associates win, YOU too win. A win for one, is a win for all. Collaboration is a win/win if you partner and associate with the right people.

3) Take Stock - Now PAUSE and breath...It is time to analyse your partnerships, collaborations and alignment. Have they been beneficial in moving you (a step or series of steps) towards your goals? Review your progress and get ready to chuck out the time-wasters. Its easy to spot them...Take a look at their track record...Do they finish anything they start? Do they make excuses upon excuses? Do they have a pattern of making "high falluting promises" that they never keep?

Set up an accountability partner or join a mastermind circle and check in from time to time to see where you stand on your success ladder...See what's working...and what's not. Or better still do it yourself, if you believe you can trust yourself to be unbiased.

We are almost down half of the year, How is your vision board lookingggg?? Is it looking pretty? Are you meeting those insane goals you set, or do you need some good help moving your butt there? If you need help, don't be afraid to ask for the help you need.

Also don't be afraid to make adjustments, after all - we learn as we go - most people think their vision board has to be cast on stone. Sometimes, reviewing our vision might require us to make necessary shifts, either by adjusting our goal-lines or our timelines. And that too is okay. Nothing to sulk over. Whew!

4) BRAG Your Pants Off - Surely, they say its not bragging if you can back up your claims. Now - I'm not suggesting you become an empty vessel that makes the loudest bang bang.

I'm just saying that, if you have been able to (B)oldly (R)adically (A)chieve (G)oals... Then blow your freaking trumpet, baby. Blow it loud and proud...And get a back-up-band to sing the "Alleluia chorus" with you. Whoosh! Just do it in a classy way.

Your naysayers do NOT want the world to hear your good news. Babyyyyy stick up your middle finger and take the gospel to them.

Do not be ashamed to let the world know how fantastic, BRILLIANT and powerful you are. You are simply honoring your hard-work.

Even if you can't afford a traditional media machinery, get a street team - fill it up with your brother, sister, neighbor or the newspaper boy down the street, use social media, employ word of mouth, guest on shows, contribute to blogs, send newsletters, take the mic from the pastor and announce it in church...take advantage of any opportunity you get to blow your megaphone, sell yourself and BLAST YOUR SUCCESS on overdrive.

I am learning that people only pay attention to what is placed right in front of them - Get NAKED in their face - Shake your colorful tail feather...And REVEAL your Awesomeness.

Don't try to live in a fool's paradise. Remember, that people won't leave their drums to beat your gong, until you become super successful. You've got to play your music right - because if nobody is aware of your greatness, how will you attract more success? Remember success begets more success... And most successful people love to surround themselves with other champions.

For tips on how to BRAG in style - Get your ear phones out and Watch this video excerpt of my international address at a Global Plenary Session on the Topic of - "Understanding Business Globalisation, Creativity and Innovative Leadership" courtesy of my fellow Iconic Woman and "Boldness Coach" from USA - Vaneese Johnson on Day 3 of the Annual Global WOMEN ECONOMIC FORUM (WEF) in New Delhi, India. I gotta be honest - I think I blew my trumpet with class! He he he.



#5) Show Gratitude & Be Thankful - Have you heard that MORE, comes to those who are thankful for what they get. Don't go about life feeling ENTITLED. Every single thing you get is a PRIVILEGE, not your birthright - because there are people out there, working just as hard, maybe even as smart - who don't have a fraction of what you have.

Be thankful for the opportunities you get, for the lessons and wisdom that come out of your mistakes. Be grateful for the advise you get, and every information that miraculously shows up on your table.

Be thankful to your mentors, coaches... those who help you stay grinding and grounded....Be Grateful to your team mates, collaborators, tribe, followers, fans, community, partners and support system. In fact - Be thankful EVEN to the haters who never believed in you (It will drive them nuts) Ha ha ha.

People give more and DO MORE for those who are not ashamed to say "Thank you".... And continue to be appreciative of the kindness, love, and support they receive.

Find innovative ways to show your gratitude. A sincere shout out, once in a while on social media, maybe even in a newspaper, radio or TV interview when you get the chance to be celebrated. Be generous and celebrate them too.

Perhaps, a nice warm out-of-the-blue personal email or message thanking whoever it is you are grateful to have in your life, maybe send a lovely surprise gift or plan a meet & greet... A special lunch date, freebie or giveaway.

To me, gratitude is the most powerful FUEL that drives our belief system.

Whether you’re a single mompreneur, solopreneur, serial entrepreneur, small business owner, a successful executive of a major fortune 500 company, an artiste, celebrity or even just an aspiring entrepreneur developing a side hustle - take some time, to truly think about what GRATITUDE means to you, what you’re truly thankful for deep down and how you can use it to your advantage.

Gratitude gives us that extra edge, that PUSH we to stay grounded even while we’re chasing our goals.

It’s such an important tool that most people generally overlook but need to be more - conscious of - if you’re going to succeed, and thrive.

Reminds me of Amy Walkers, GIVE GRATITUDE SUMMIT last year November. I was one of the 11 Experts (and the only African Speaker) who shared how gratitude and giving can elevate your business. If you missed it, my session was on Day 1 of the virtual summit - You can LISTEN HERE.


Want To Make SUCCESS Moves? - HERE'S YOUR CALL TO ACTION - Take YOUR Pick!

 


#1) Grab the 9 Success Principles  I use to earn my BRAGGING Rights? Get your copy of my Digital Bundle - STRIPPED DOWN SUCCESS For Creatives. (This bundle contains an eBook, Work-Book and Bonus Audio) with practical and actionable strategies you can use collectively to achieve more success, no matter where you are on the success ladder. CLICK HERE For Bundle.

#2) You can join My LIVE 1-1 TRAINING CLASS from anywhere you are in the world on ZEQR - For one hour, I'll teach you the 9 Principles for Success...and hold your hands as you make big moves. Only 8 seats available per class.

How To Become A Successful Creative In Just 9 Weeks...


#3) Feel FREE to jump in and Join ME inside my Inner Circle and CONNECT with other VIP's in - The BRAG Club (For Influencers). Invite your fellow influencers too - It's FREE. Success rubs off nicely. Remember you are a product of the people you surround yourself with. Go to www.TheBragClub.com. There's a welcome GIFT waiting for you on the Inside.


To Your Success,
Stay Authentic & Keep Winning!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LETS TALK: What do You THINK, Truth-Seekers? Feel free to EXPRESS your thoughts in the comment section. Better still, send me a FREE Voice Message and I'll respond.



or you could use the PINK Button on the right side (desktop view) to leave me a Message. I'll love to HEAR from you. And don't forget to watch the replay or GRAB your pass to get the downloadable recording of the just concluded live virtual summit with ME and 25 Amazing Speakers from around the world at THE NAKED CHALLENGE: Creative Mastery Global Summit 2016 that streamed LIVE from Monday July 4 - Saturday July 9, 2016.

Click HERE to Join Waiting List & Be among first 100 Creatives to Get 50% Discount on  Summit Bundles.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I look forward to hanging out with All VIP Influencers in the Prestigious 'THE BRAG CLUB. Want to Reach More Goals, Create More Impact and Earn Your Bragging Rights? Click GO NOW

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Have you grabbed your own COPY of my Highly Acclaimed Book- THE NAKED TRUTH: Lies Stripped...? The Reviews are great. Just Click PLAY to listen to the Audio Preview OR on the book image to go to my OFFICIAL WEBSITE,  or BUY @ AMAZONSMASHWORD, BARNES & NOBLE or PayHip and GUMROAD.

It is a Witty Intimate & Relatable guide to the crazy TRUTH about Love, Life, Relationship, Sex, Reality & Re-invention of self. It offers WISDOM to those who are struggling to accept the truth about who they really are and what they truly want out of life.  Get your copy NOW!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Join my signature VIP Coaching for Influencers - REIVENTION 1-on-1 I'm very excited to show you step by step, in just 30 days, how I have re- built my brand from stagnancy back to relevance. Go EARLY NOW and Register HERE for your 25% discount.


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Get ready for a BRAND NEW SEASON  starting in July 2017. forget to call in to my globally syndicated show via +1-(215)-383-3766 and catch me on Talk Wednesday and Friday Radio SpecialLIVE @ 9pm (GMT) on THE NAKED TALK Radio Show. Its always a stimulating conversation with my guests. 



NOTE : Join Me In My Effort To Change The World With My Empowering Thoughts. If You Like Today's 'Boost....Then Don't Forget To Comment and Share It With Those You Love (Or Even Like A Lot).

Got A Question? Feel Free To #AskAlexHere. If You Want Some Talk Therapy Instead, Then Take Advantage of my Private One-on-One and Book an appointment with #AskAlex using SetMore NOW!!!

Have A Wonderful Wednesday Lovelies. Kisses!!!





Read more ...

Wednesday, 12 April 2017

11 Tips to Lead Your Personal Life & Business With Excellence


"If YOU don't have much - perhaps it's because you haven't become much."

SUCCESS is something you attract, by the person that you become. If you want MORE, you must work at becoming more.

There are too many talented people who NEVER accomplish anything... because they focus so much on what they think their hands, legs, face and body can do.

They forget that the body has limitations but the MIND doesn't. In fact the mind is the only part of our being that can expand, conceive, create and achieve whatever it wants. Yet many people rarely focus on building their minds daily.

They will exercise their body, pamper their faces, wear quality make up, treat themselves to a spa date, massage, good food, vitamins or whatever they need to maintain the outer body.

But these same people will rarely pick up a book, listen to a teaching, meditate or find ways to connect with powerful minds and thought leaders that will enable them to achieve the success they want.

How many good singers who focus solely on their instrument "The Powerful Voice" they have and all the many octaves they can sing, yet go nowhere in their career.

When blind men like Stevie Wonder, Ray Charles or Nigeria's Cobhams Asuquo play musical instruments on key without their physical eyes or a blind man like my good friend, Maxwell Ivey Jr writes a Weekly Inspirational Blog and Authored Two Books himself...when some people who have their eye sights still use a ghost writer or even hold on to their numerous excuses.

It's ALL in the MIND...How often do you NURTURE it, stretch it and exercise it?

Two weeks ago, I was a speaker on THE LEADERSHIP BOUTIQUE hosted by International Speaker, Award-winning Author & Life Strategist - SharRon Jamison from Atlanta, USA with 6 other powerful women who lead with Beauty, Boldness AND Brilliance. I was excited to connect, empower and answer questions on personal & business leadership.



Plus how I've been able to take my brand & message globally - from inside Africa.

I shared tips, insights and resources.... And HERE are some key take-away from my session that will help you LEAD your personal & business life with excellence.😆👍

------------------------------
👏👏👏👌

Nuggets from The NAKED Philosophy:

1) When you choose to collaborate, make sure your vision aligns with the collaborator's vision.

2) Be Proactive. Ask to partner or to be on shows or stages. Don't FEAR rejection. Be intentional about every single goal.

3) There are two ways to get PAID for the work you do: Goodwill and Cash. The NAKED TRUTH - Goodwill is a currency that can get you much further than money can. (that is how I got featured on a huge billboard in New York Times Square, and how I got invited to be a speaker & member of the Advisory Executive Council (AEC) for the WOMEN ECONOMIC FORUM (WEF2017) happening in India).🙌

4) Use your negotiating power to be compensated for your work; Money is not the only way to get compensated - i.e my work as an International Contributor to The Huffington Post in the USA brings me opportunities that pay me.🙌

5) All collaborations should be win/win. You win...They win...Everyone involved wins.

6) Don't be afraid to let people know who you really are. REVEAL yourself - Your awesomeness, Your Expertise and your Unique Selling Point. Don't hide your brilliance.

7) "Get Naked" - Its okay to be vulnerable and transparent to earn TRUST (trust is important in business and leadership) People only do business, partner or BUY from people they trust. Its okay to strip away all barriers & boundaries limiting you.

8) Identify the limiting beliefs that prevent you from looking at OPTIONS in different markets.

9) Connect with people - No matter where they are in the world. Develop relationships.

10) Always add VALUE. People will always want to work with you if you add value to their projects too.

11) Apply my Tranformational principles of A.S.R.A for Personal & Business Success.

You can still sign up  HERE to get your Free access to the Replay and some fantastic giveaways.

I hope some of my nuggets are helpful.

Last week I got another great opportunity to guest, on two amazing TV shows here in Lagos. Including being a celebrity guest on the HOT SEAT, for a special edition of Nigeria's hottest TV Game show - "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" and play for an incredible charity. Whoop! And even though I and my partner won the highest amount (Two Million Naira). I learned several incredible lessons on leadership, from participating with 10 other celebrities on the show. And I will share them on my next HNS article for Huffington Post.

P.S; Want a VIP one-on-one with me? Join ME on my signature VIP program for influencers - REINVENTION 1-on-1. Just YOU and me meeting virtually (as I hold your hand for 30 days) building a step by step plan to help you slay your next goals and take your vision further to those who care about YOU & what you have to offer.

I only have 10 available slots monthly for those who are READY to PLAY BIG and achieve their goals. (If you are interested, GO HERE or Contact Me).

I'll be happy to show you how. Its never too late to REINVENT your brand, business, platforms, message or product.

Go NOW and Register HERE for your 25% discount.



To Your Success Truth-Seeker,
Stay Authentic & Keep Winning!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LETS TALK: What do You THINK, Truth-Seekers? Feel free to EXPRESS your thoughts in the comment section. Better still, send me a FREE Voice Message.



or you could use the PINK Button on the right side (desktop view) to leave me a Message. I'll love to HEAR from you. And don't forget to watch the replay or GRAB your pass to get the downloadable recording of the just concluded live virtual summit with ME and 25 Amazing Speakers from around the world at THE NAKED CHALLENGE: Creative Mastery Global Summit 2016 that streamed LIVE from Monday July 4 - Saturday July 9, 2016.

Click HERE to Join Waiting List & Be among first 100 Creatives to Get 50% Discount on Downloadable Recording & Summit Resources.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I look forward to hanging out with All ABC Creatives in the Prestigious 'ALEX'S BRAG COMMUNITY' Virtual Lounge. Want to acquire new skills, expand your mind, connect with influencers & get ACCESS to the THE NAKED BLISS ACADEMY at www.AlexOkoroji.com and a 25% VIP Membership discount. Click GO NOW

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Have you grabbed your own COPY of my Highly Acclaimed Book- THE NAKED TRUTH: Lies Stripped...? The Reviews are great. Just Click PLAY to listen to the Audio Preview OR on the book image to go to my OFFICIAL WEBSITE,  or BUY @ AMAZONSMASHWORD, BARNES & NOBLE or PayHip and GUMROAD.

It is a Witty Intimate & Relatable guide to the crazy TRUTH about Love, Life, Relationship, Sex, Reality & Re-invention of self. It offers WISDOM to those who are struggling to accept the truth about who they really are and what they truly want out of life.  Get your copy NOW!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


P.S: If You love what I do...You can become a VIP STAR PATRON by making a monthly pledge to get access to my exclusive VIP conversations with influencers & expert guests frSom around the world, as well as my best quality content before anyone else in my community + earn some good REWARDS. Click PLEDGE to become my PATRON now!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Don't forget to call in to my globally syndicated show via +1-(215)-383-3766 and catch me on Talk Wednesday and Friday Radio SpecialLIVE @ 9pm (GMT) on THE NAKED TALK Radio Show. Its always a stimulating conversation with my guests. 



NOTE : Join Me In My Effort To Change The World With My Empowering Thoughts. If You Like Today's 'Love And Naked Reality'....Then Don't Forget To Comment and Share It With Those You Love (Or Even Like A Lot).

Got A Question? Feel Free To #AskAlexHere. If You Want Some Talk Therapy Instead, Then Take Advantage of my Private One-on-One and Book an appointment with #AskAlex using SetMore NOW!!!

Have A Wonderful Wednesday Lovelies. Kisses!!!





Read more ...

Sunday, 22 January 2017

Every Single Thing Matters...


I was talking to a friend recently, and he told me that I'm a strategic lover...Ha ha ha...I honestly don't know what that means, but I believe he meant to say 'calculated' or perhaps that I'm a conscious lover...Some hate it that I'm very analytical, as well as sensitive and I take nothing for granted...and that would be correct, but I don't think it is a bad thing - living a life of complete awareness about who you are, what you do, what your weaknesses are and what you really want. Isn't that what being NAKED is about?

Recently, I have been working on giving my life a better direction. A conscious direction that isn't influenced by prejudice, societal expectations or even family pressure. But a solemn reminder that if  at all anything matters...then by all means, EVERY SINGLE THING MATTERS. Good or bad...big or small, wrong or right.

All my life, I’ve watched my parents do the 'big things' like work, business, events, awards etc and when I was younger... I also was encouraged to focus on those big things myself, like school, work, church etc They were the things that mattered. You had to be the best. Be first in class, not lesser than third position. But we weren't taught to be thankful for ending up 10th position in a class of 65 students. So that year in 1992, I had falsified my teachers handwriting and changed my results to 3rd.

It didn't matter that I wasn't last...that I beat 55 other students, I felt I was still a failure because I didn't somehow meet their own standard of success. Hey, you might say I was being groomed by my parents for EXCELLENCE. But in our daily pursuit of excellence we now forget to teach gratitude and appreciation for the life and the things we have, in-spite of its imperfection or the lack. Big reason for all the depressed, unhappy and unfulfilled people who hate their lives.

To be honest, I don't think it mattered back then that I had learned more things that school session than I knew before. What mattered was how I ranked against others. And that's how many of us look at life. Our parents even compare themselves to us, and we compare ourselves to our children - but when did life become such a competition? Aren't we all supposed to be running our own race.

As I have grown, I realise that we care so much more about competition and perception... And we look out for the things that highlight them... i.e...the results, the degrees, the certificates, the nominations, the awards, the headlines... And not what lessons, skills, information or relationships the person has acquired, picked up or learned that might enrich their lives and the lives of others.

We have become so attached to our 'Shiny Object Syndrome' that we focus so much on the big things...the big picture and who's watching our big fat leap . So much so that little efforts no longer matter.And sometimes even I get carried away, by the pressure to conform.

But if you pay deeper attention to those who only care about berating or judging you for the 'supposed' big things you NEVER achieve or have failed to achieve in your life - In some of them, you’ll see where their PESSIMISM limits them. In many, you’ll see where their OPTIMISM confuses them. In some, you’ll see where their CONCEIT hinders them. In others, you’ll even see where their IGNORANCE blinds them. But you mustn't allow yourself to become drained by their opinions or judgement.

You can't let the fact that it doesn't matter to them, how hard you work; toil - day and night and that you refuse to sleep around or commit crime for money. Or that your definition of hard work may not necessarily match theirs or require you to place a full page advertorial for the world to see just how committed you are to making progress. In the end - all they want to know - is why you aren't doing what your mates are doing to succeed? And many will even ask you -  Where is the freaking money? How can you say you are working hard when I haven't seen the money yet. I haven't seen any changes.

Of course to them, Its all about the money, not how you make the money. Its all about the fame, not how you make the fame. Its all about the love, not who or where the love is coming from. Its all about the end result...Not what it takes you to get there. They won't cheer you on your race to the finish line but they want to be there at the tail end waiting for your result. Still, if you want a life of direction, you must remind yourself that the process too matters.

Nobody may care that you might have to buy those beautiful clothes on credit. They just want to see you slaying the blogs every week from one fashion event to another. It doesn't matter that your in-expensive dress looks good - it only matters if it is a custom made design from Roberto Cavalli or Ralph Lauren.

We mock a family for struggling to pay school fees but we forget to praise them for managing to give their children three square meals or put a roof over their heads. Doesn't that matter?

We say that pretty lady doesn't have a man to call her own. But we forget to praise her for doing a good job, raising her child on her own. Doesn't that matter?

We scold our employee for not consulting us first on a project, but we never praise them for coming in early and doing hours of overtime with no extra benefits. Or don't you think that matters?

We are constantly complaining our partner doesn't love us, but we forget to praise them for all the time we ignore them or disrespect them. Shouldn't that count for something?

We complain our grown up kids are dependent on us, but we forget to thank God for even giving us children in the first place, When many will do anything to have children from their own loins, they wish they can spoil with love - yet can not. Still, we don't think it matters.

We think of the big things that aren't there and we FORGET the SMALL things that are.

But I realize now it’s the small things that make the difference. That's why I no longer let people drain me with their own narrative of who they think I am...should be or should have been...or even let them discourage me with a long list of all the things I do wrong and not the ones I do right. Or the dreams I'm yet to achieve. And many a times, I find out - its their own dreams and not mine.

I have learned that It’s the things we do before school or after school, before work or after work, before church or after church, before taking on our goals and after achieving them, before sex like the foreplay or even after sex like the cuddle - that makes the real difference.

Like when I'm not the actual host of a new TV show but I'm still proud and honored to lend my voice to segments of the TV broadcast. And I can still celebrate that - Because that too matters.

Those are the things that take you from where you are to where you want to be.

The knowledge that everything matters. That we can't write off any experience.

I learned recently, that we can’t just focus on business all the time and forget our relationships. That we can’t just be in love and not focus on our own personal goals. We can’t focus on business and love and then forget about our health. We can’t just work and not play. We can’t just play and not work. We can't do nice things for strangers and then forget our FAMILY also needs us. We can't just be HAPPY 24/7 and not expect some sadness on the way. We can't just SOAR, and not expect some challenges or WIN at everything and not expect to fail at some. And nobody should ever expect that of us because life isn't perfect, and neither are we.

But everything matters and everything effects everything. You have to make all of these different aspects of life work together and enjoy the process. Or how will you appreciate LIGHT, if you've never experienced darkness. As they say, success is not a destination but in fact, a journey.

So why not give your life direction based on the map of a never ending journey. Surely you might not be where you want to be yet, but you know that you are not where, you used to be. Alas! And that is all that matters...For as long as you continue to travel, everyday taking baby steps, or making little tiny (sometimes unseen) bits of progress. The world may not notice...But you know - that you are living a conscious life with direction. And that is what truly matters.

P.S: Get ready to join my signature VIP program for Influencers - REIVENTION 1-on-1 I'm very excited to show you step by step, in just 30 days, how I have re- built my brand from stagnancy back to relevance. Go EARLY NOW and Register HERE for your 25% discount.



Stay Authentic & Keep Winning!
This blog has been verified by Rise: R64b6626d035418d0fd633dceef09503d
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LETS TALK: What do You THINK, Truth-Seekers? Feel free to EXPRESS your thoughts in the comment section. Better still, send me a FREE Voice Message.



or you could use the PINK Button on the right side (desktop view) to leave me a Message. I'll love to HEAR from you. And don't forget to watch the replay or GRAB your pass to get the downloadable recording of the just concluded live virtual summit with ME and 25 Amazing Speakers from around the world at THE NAKED CHALLENGE: Creative Mastery Global Summit 2016 that streamed LIVE from Monday July 4 - Saturday July 9, 2016.

Click HERE to Join Waiting List & Be among first 100 Creatives to Get 50% Discount on Downloadable Recording & Summit Resources.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I look forward to hanging out with All ABC Creatives in the Prestigious 'ALEX'S BRAG COMMUNITY' Virtual Lounge. Want to acquire new skills, expand your mind, connect with influencers & get ACCESS to the THE NAKED BLISS ACADEMY at www.AlexOkoroji.com and a 25% VIP Membership discount. Click GO NOW

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Have you grabbed your own COPY of my Highly Acclaimed Book- THE NAKED TRUTH: Lies Stripped...? The Reviews are great. Just Click PLAY to listen to the Audio Preview OR on the book image to go to my OFFICIAL WEBSITE,  or BUY @ AMAZONSMASHWORD, BARNES & NOBLE or PayHip and GUMROAD.

It is a Witty Intimate & Relatable guide to the crazy TRUTH about Love, Life, Relationship, Sex, Reality & Re-invention of self. It offers WISDOM to those who are struggling to accept the truth about who they really are and what they truly want out of life.  Get your copy NOW!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


P.S: If You love what I do...You can become a VIP STAR PATRON by making a monthly pledge to get access to my exclusive VIP conversations with influencers & expert guests frSom around the world, as well as my best quality content before anyone else in my community + earn some good REWARDS. Click PLEDGE to become my PATRON now!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Don't forget to call in to my globally syndicated show via +1-(215)-383-3766 and catch me on Talk Wednesday and Friday Radio SpecialLIVE @ 9pm (GMT) on THE NAKED TALK Radio Show. Its always a stimulating conversation with my guests. 



NOTE : Join Me In My Effort To Change The World With My Empowering Thoughts. If You Like Today's 'Love And Naked Reality'....Then Don't Forget To Comment and Share It With Those You Love (Or Even Like A Lot).

Got A Question? Feel Free To #AskAlexHere. If You Want Some Talk Therapy Instead, Then Take Advantage of my Private One-on-One and Book an appointment with #AskAlex using SetMore NOW!!!

Have A Sweet Sunday Lovelies. Kisses!!!





Read more ...

Monday, 16 January 2017

Sex and My Bare Chest


Over the weekend, one of my friends, Vanessa Mbamarah and contributing author of my soon-to-be-released Anthology, sent me a rather interesting message about sex and what women are looking for in the men we seek out, a sex partner or a building partner?

Of course I went off in my signature alleluia dance waving my lace PANTIES in the air. Its the unholy dance I do, when I read something that deeply stirs my belly and stimulates my mind to consciousness. She was spot on. We think we want a building partner but somehow most of us end up choosing a sex partner...I would know right? Ha ha ha.

And It was almost as if I myself had written that article - except no, it was the french speaking Bellisima in uptown Benin Republic waking us up with her #BuildRegardless mindset for the new week.

It had me thinking deeply of my own honest views about sex... And how as a single woman, I am able to somehow draw a line on what is permissible for me and what it isn't. In this book I'm able to have that downright NAKED & unfiltered conversation with myself. And if you think I'm crazy here's a chance to read excerpts from my own personal chapter in I BARED MY CHEST: 21 Unstoppable Women Dig For Bold & Bravely Share Their NAKED Truth. In CHAPTER 2: NAKED Is Not Covered Up... I STRIP the blinds on sex. Let me know what you think. Enjoy!

What if I said there was something spiritual about sex? Oh! I have been known to scream “Oh God…Oh God…”. Ha! If the sex is good, you’ll hear me call on God’s name.

Yass! I am not calling the name of the man lying naked on top of me, slamming away. Geez! No! It’s the other one – watching us all perform. I don’t know how many times I have called God – unknowingly invited him in to my shebang. I mean they say, when you call on him – God answers.

Does he answer when I make those weird calls? Sometimes, I even wonder if he has a show-reel of all of us going at it. He He…I don’t mean in a perverse way. But I can't help but wonder.

For me – Sex isn’t just two bodies laying together. It is two spirits merging in to one, and accepting each other at that very moment, flaws, warts and all. It is the most intimate and intrusive connection you can have with another being.
 
Yet, Sex is one word, one act - we have been subconsciously taught to become weary of…And I can’t believe for years, how afraid I was of the idea of letting someone of the male specie, lay with me. You see when I was in high school, most of my friends already had sexual encounters with their boyfriends. I had a boyfriend…but, I never let him go down the valley with me.

In fact I had already dated two or three guys…And it was nothing more than a kiss, a hug and a freaking good smooch...Let’s say we always stopped at second base. If their fingers got anywhere near my knickers, the alarm will ring. No I wasn’t wearing the church bells around my panties. I won’t pretend to be a miss goody two shoes.

I was just afraid – like many girls, afraid to discover the pleasure a few of my girlfriends, had whispered about and experimented with.
 
Even as I grew a few years older – I think I was 19 going on 20. My first experience was nothing spectacular. Really, it wasn’t. I don’t even remember the first time. I know it was somewhere at my ex boyfriend’s brothers apartment – but I don’t remember how it happened. I just know – he was in, he was out and I was somehow bruised a little. No music, no candles, no flowers and certainly no soft whispers in my ears – Just my new boyfriend slamming in to my dry patched wood. 
And even though we dated for almost two years and had sex every other day. It was something I did to please him…to keep him – to feel connected to him.

In fact, if I ever had sex – it was always for the man and never for my own pleasure. I had been so disillusioned by popular myths, that men cared the most about FOOD and SEX – and that, it was the only way to their heart or to keep our connection with them – 12 years later, I know that is absolutely 100% hogwash.

Geez! You can do a million Brazilian squats a day, wear his boxers as your straw hat, waltz down the cold Alaskan slope butt NAKED on a zip line, fold your lacy Victoria secret panties as his pocket square, use his sperm as your daily moisturizer, and serve him the moon for breakfast and the sun for dinner…
 
You can even squeeze your “Vijayjay” till the damn thing is tighter than a heavy slap, rinse your snatch with cold freshly squeezed pineapple juice or even screw him standing on your head, while sucking your thumb, Ha h ha…I bet you, that a man who didn’t already value you - will never VALUE you, because earning his love and respect, unfortunately has nothing to do with him BUT everything to do with you and how much YOU value and love yourself. And what unacceptable behaviour, you are willing to tolerate or draw the line on. 
Of course, I had to learn these, the hard way - after all the times I had played “Fetch and Catch” or tea bagged him, despite my very sore and inflamed tonsils, only to hear he was still plumbing his ex-girlfriend’s community pipes.

I also had to learn what my preference was after being dragged in to a threesome, and realising there’s absolutely nothing I fancy about sexual theatrics. I don't want to be skipping ropes in the bedroom, doing the somersault and trying to prove to my partner that I have a freakin' rubber band for a waist. Ha! Oh and please...There's also nothing cool about sharing a man with a friend or even worse, a stranger. Three for me is a crowd. Chew on that!

Now it’s all so different for me…I couldn’t care less if a man I’m seeing, has blue balls or red balls or a giant pokadot on his penis about to burst – I only step in between the sheets for me, BECAUSE I realised that sex ought to be a tool of my own innate EXRESSION, an art of communicating my own deepest desires and my truest feelings – not his.

It is the language for which I will use my body to express affection in a way - words cannot even describe.

And no matter how society has reduced sex to nothing more than a commodity, or a bargaining tool. It is NOT a tool for manipulation or a tool to measure a person’s character or even a tool to earn favours. Unfortunately we women still use SEX to get “love” from men, and Men use LOVE to get “sex” from us. How ironic?
 
Still, it didn’t stop me from craving an experience I only read in Magazines. And worry about the moment I was going to experience my own “Soul Sex” or even have my partner reach the damned G-Spot.

I mean I was starting to fear that I was going to end up one of those women who will go through life without experiencing an ORGASM. I mean a real earth shattering climax. Yes! I've said it over and over again in my blogs.

I'm one of those magic O's. I reach heaven every once in a leap year. Expecting me to orgasm is pretty much like performing magic, waving that mystical wand at the Power Holding Commission in Nigeria and suddenly expecting our very epileptic power supply to stabilize. Like for real?? Ha Ha Ha. Oh please, I'm in my 30’s. I don’t believe in Magic tricks.

So Imagine a Penis dribbling and pummelling away, pounding me....Aaarrgh!

That's the sound of flesh against flesh. My insides get a little weird sensation. I'm MOANING and grimacing....maybe grimacing and moaning. Not sure in which order, it follows though.
 
I think I'm going to SCREAM....it’s coming. Err....I mean, I'm cumming....Oh Shucks! Bloody HELL… Don't go....Don't stop! Not now...Oh no! Damn!
Whew! Black out!
 
Nothing happened. And then, the idiot on top of me stiffens, HE goes limp and he lays flat like a pack of cards. Ha!

For a moment - I thought it was me dying....no it was him. Schmuck!!!

“Did you enjoy it Alex?” (Why? Seriously??? Why ask me this kind of question?)
Err, yea... (I smile) “What do you think?” - I ask him…Of course, that's me trying not to LIE and still hoping not to deflate his ego or SHRINK his already limb penis.

My eye takes a quick stroll down south. Oh Yeah, Mr Penis is asleep alright - Selfish bastard. Ha Ha Ha.
 
That pretty much has been the story of my SEXUAL life.

I can count how many times, I have achieved a climax from penetration on one hand....I mean, I pretty much have resigned myself to the fact that only two ways can make it happen.

I either help myself. (Don't wince. It’s okay, it’s okay if you do it too. They say It’s healthy. As long as it’s not an everyday habit - Ask your therapist. It’s your body, remember....and it takes me less than five minutes on a good day....BAM!)

That OR the man I'm dating, simply has to go down on all fours and EAT like his life totally depends on it. Which by the way, is usually the most realistic consolation for me.
So on this very fine day, after staying months away from sex.

Yes, I always take months on end – when I choose to be celibate (I’ve done somewhere between six months to 19 months without any- and no I didn’t die.) on several occasions. But this time somewhere around the seventh month, I fell flat on my back, on what was the most unplanned sexual encounter, any grown woman could anticipate.

I had been out for a drink with Pony (not his real name....and don't ask me why I like to name my men after animals or why I even attract a TIGER and a PONY) Hehehe.

So Pony, my Ex who I hadn't seen in 12 years was in town and wanted to meet up for some business discussion. Of course, I'm always available for BUSINESS as long as it's in line with my vision... Tap that!...Err... (To read more - Pre-order a copy of the book - I BARED MY CHEST right HERE and receive a bonus audio version of my chapter)

So, what are your personal views about SEX? Are you able to have an honest conversation about it and express what they are? Well, there's more where that came from - as 20 other unstoppable women join me in sharing their own unique views on sex amongst other important subjects that affect us as individuals..


Don't wait till the March 8 release.You can now PRE-ORDER your special copy of this global book HERE and get a bonus audio version of Chapter 1 and 2. You can also read one of my recent excerpt THE NAKED TRUTH ABOUT REAL WEALTH on Huffington Post.

P.S: Get ready to join my signature VIP program - REIVENTION 1-on-1 I'm very excited to show you step by step, how I have re- built my brand from stagnancy back to relevance in just 30 days. Go EARLY NOW and Register HERE for your 25% discount.



Stay Authentic & Keep Winning!

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LETS TALK: What do You THINK, Truth-Seekers? Feel free to EXPRESS your thoughts in the comment section. Better still, send me a FREE Voice Message.



or you could use the PINK Button on the right side (desktop view) to leave me a Message. I'll love to HEAR from you. And don't forget to watch the replay or GRAB your pass to get the downloadable recording of the just concluded live virtual summit with ME and 25 Amazing Speakers from around the world at THE NAKED CHALLENGE: Creative Mastery Global Summit 2016 that streamed LIVE from Monday July 4 - Saturday July 9, 2016.

Click HERE to Join Waiting List & Be among first 100 Creatives to Get 50% Discount on Downloadable Recording & Summit Resources.

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I look forward to hanging out with All ABC Creatives in the Prestigious 'ALEX'S BRAG COMMUNITY' Virtual Lounge. Want to acquire new skills, expand your mind, connect with influencers & get ACCESS to the THE NAKED BLISS ACADEMY at www.AlexOkoroji.com and a 25% VIP Membership discount. Click GO NOW

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Have you grabbed your own COPY of my Highly Acclaimed Book- THE NAKED TRUTH: Lies Stripped...? The Reviews are great. Just Click PLAY to listen to the Audio Preview OR on the book image to go to my OFFICIAL WEBSITE,  or BUY @ AMAZONSMASHWORD, BARNES & NOBLE or PayHip and GUMROAD.

It is a Witty Intimate & Relatable guide to the crazy TRUTH about Love, Life, Relationship, Sex, Reality & Re-invention of self. It offers WISDOM to those who are struggling to accept the truth about who they really are and what they truly want out of life.  Get your copy NOW!

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P.S: If You love what I do...You can become a VIP STAR PATRON by making a monthly pledge to get access to my exclusive VIP conversations with influencers & expert guests frSom around the world, as well as my best quality content before anyone else in my community + earn some good REWARDS. Click PLEDGE to become my PATRON now!

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Don't forget to call in to my globally syndicated show via +1-(215)-383-3766 and catch me on Talk Wednesday and Friday Radio SpecialLIVE @ 9pm (GMT) on THE NAKED TALK Radio Show. Its always a stimulating conversation with my guests. 



NOTE : Join Me In My Effort To Change The World With My Empowering Thoughts. If You Like Today's 'Love And Naked Reality'....Then Don't Forget To Comment and Share It With Those You Love (Or Even Like A Lot).

Got A Question? Feel Free To #AskAlexHere. If You Want Some Talk Therapy Instead, Then Take Advantage of my Private One-on-One and Book an appointment with #AskAlex using SetMore NOW!!!

Have A Magnificent Monday Lovelies. Kisses!!!





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